A New Attitude

Dream: I’m in my car in the driver’s seat in a large film studio’s prop building. I turn to see where I’m going as I back out. I put my foot on the accelerator and it sticks and begins to go very fast in reverse. I’m so frightened I will hit someone or damage something. I look in the rear view mirror as I speed backwards and then bang, I crash into something. I hit a large two story wall with beautiful artwork of a villa scene with people – it falls over and is destroyed. I think about all the work and effort to build it and paint it, all the arches and people in the scenes. I seek out a manager and tell him I need to pay for the damages. He looks at me and says all is good and it’s ok to go now.

This dream occurred many years after the 2008 recession, when my art business was severely impacted and ultimately downsized to survive the economic downturn. Even years later, I still carried guilt over laying off staff and I felt responsible for what had happened.

The dream showed me otherwise. The stuck accelerator symbolized circumstances beyond my control that propelled events toward an unavoidable crash. My impulse was to pay for the damages, to assume responsibility for everything that had been lost. Yet the manager simply told me it was all good and that I could go.

The setting itself offered another insight. A film studio creates elaborate worlds that are temporary by design - sets are built, dismantled, and rebuilt. The destroyed artwork mirrored my own creative losses during the downsizing, but it also reminded me that endings make way for new creations.

This new perspective, what Carl Jung called a "new attitude", released years of guilt and inner torment. I finally understood deep in my heart the role I played. I was always free to let go of the past, and now I could embrace new opportunities with greater peace and wholeness.